Faltering Read online

  I shift from one foot to the other, wondering what to do next. Alec grabs my hand. “Come on, let’s get moving. We don’t want to be out under this burning sun too long. You look like you might melt.”

  He starts walking but doesn’t let go of my hand. We follow the rest of the passengers, who are making their way toward the distant town.

  I squint my eyes, peering ahead. “I don’t see a thing. Are you sure there’s a town around here? Maybe we should stay with the train.”

  “Not a good idea—it won’t have air conditioning or electricity overnight. It’s only about two miles to the town.” In this hot desert, that is going to be a long walk. My body and face are already coated with a slick layer of sweat.

  “Hold on a minute,” I say and stop walking. Alec drops my hand. He turns and gazes down the full length of my body.

  I twist my long blond hair into a knot at the nape of my neck, hoping it will help cool me off. But as Alec’s smoldering eyes fixate on me, I’m burning up.

  Suddenly, he reaches out his hand and tenderly brushes the hair off my face. “You look really hot.”

  What!? My heart lurches for a quick second, and then I realize he just means I look sweaty. I groan inwardly, not even wanting to know what a mess I must look like right now.

  I reach into my bag to find my sunglasses. Now I feel a little more protected, both from the glaring sun and Alec’s penetrating gaze.

  “Okay, we can go now.”

  “Good, let’s get moving.” He surprises me by taking my hand again. I raise a questioning eyebrow—isn’t this a little more than just friends?—but I don’t pull my hand away.

  ****

  “Thank God.” I drop my bag to the ground, relieved to finally be somewhere. But where, exactly, is not quite clear. The main street of town, if you can call it that, is lined with a couple of cement block buildings. There’s no hotel or restaurant in sight. A neon Coke sign catches our attention.

  “Let’s grab something to drink,” Alec says, then reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone. “Damn, I’ve got nothing here, how ’bout you?”

  I reach into my bag and find my phone. No bars. “Nope, nothing.”

  This just keeps getting better and better.

  As we wander down the dirt street drinking our sodas, a couple of children run up to us. Alec and I are a definite curiosity here. The kids reach out to touch us and chatter away, eager to practice their English. “Hello! Hello! Where you from?”

  Alec smiles and quickly starts speaking to them in their native tongue. They clamor to be heard over one another. He appears to be negotiating with one slightly older child—maybe he’s twelve? Soon, the older one hushes the rest and begins to walk away, gesturing for us to follow. I look quizzically at Alec.

  He grins, takes my hand again, and we follow the boy. “Come on.”

  “Where are we going? I don’t see anywhere to stay.”

  “We’re going to be guests tonight of a local family,” Alec replies. “There’s really nowhere else to stay in a town like this, so we don’t have many options.”

  Oh, this should be interesting.

  After a short stroll through the village, the boy stops in front of a small cement house. He opens the door and we step inside. My eyes take a moment to adjust to the dim light inside, quite a difference from the glaring desert sun. The cement walls are thick, and the cooler air is heavenly. The house is well kept and larger than it appears from the outside. Standing in the main living area, we can see through to a courtyard. Glancing around, I take in the oriental rugs on the floor and the comfortable-looking, if slightly worn, furnishings. The boy gestures for us to place our bags down in the corner and then calls out to someone inside. An older woman, dressed in a long, loose, dark-colored dress appears from a back room and gazes at us. Her eyes widen with surprise, and the boy speaks rapidly to her and gestures toward us.

  The woman sizes us up, then nods. Smiling, she makes a welcoming gesture and says, “Welcome, welcome,” and invites us deeper inside the home. Alec smiles politely and says a few phrases in Arabic. At that, the woman positively beams—whatever he has said has clearly made her very happy. She leads us into a small kitchen and bids us to sit at the table. She speaks in Arabic to Alec, asking him several questions, to which he responds in the positive. She turns to the stove, puts on a kettle, and then hustles out of the room.

  I turn to Alec and raise my eyebrows.

  “She’s going to prepare a room for us to sleep in tonight. I told her we are on our honeymoon and she is very excited.”

  My jaw drops. What?!

  “I had to tell her we were married or no one would have taken us in,” he continues, obviously amused. “I thought being on our honeymoon was a nice touch.”

  Apparently, she has called her neighbors to tell them about her visitors, because before I know it, several women are crowding in the kitchen, all eager to have a look at us. The women are all dressed modestly, with headscarves covering their hair and long sleeves covering their arms. I feel slightly embarrassed by my uncovered hair and skin. As if sensing my discomfort, Alec gestures toward me and then says something to the women. They smile and nod and continue their curious chatter.

  Our hostess leaves the room for a moment and when she comes back, she has a midnight blue silk scarf in her hand. She walks over to where I am seated at the table and places the scarf across my hair. She winds it around and deftly ties it into place. She looks at me, nodding, and smiles broadly. “Pretty, very pretty,” she says.

  The other women look on with approval. I glance at Alec to see what he thinks and he grins. “Blue looks good on you.”

  Our hostess offers us food and we eat eagerly, hungry from the long walk. Several more people have come home and everyone has squeezed into the tiny kitchen to stare at us and ask questions about where we are from and what we are doing here. Alec answers all of their questions and tells them about the broken-down train. They nod sympathetically. Apparently, this is something that happens often.

  I try to stifle a yawn and Alec looks over at me. “You look tired, and like you could use a shower.”

  “Yeah…”

  He speaks to our hostess again and motions toward me. She nods and sends one of her children out of the room.

  “They are going to get our room ready so we can get cleaned up and rest for the night,” he fills me in.

  A hot shower and some fresh clothes sound heavenly. The dust and sweat of the day is clinging to me, and I can’t wait to freshen up.

  A few minutes later, a teenage girl comes back into the room. She’s dressed in jeans and a T-shirt, her dark hair pulled back in a ponytail. Smiling, she gestures for me to follow her and then heads down a small hallway and into a large bathroom. In the center of the room is a giant claw-footed tub. She hands me two fluffy Egyptian cotton towels.

  “When you are finished cleaning up, your room is right across the hall,” she says in perfect English, with only a slight accent.

  “Thanks,” I say, grateful to have a few moments alone. A lot has happened since we arrived at the train station this morning. She eyes me with curiosity, like she wants to ask me something, but instead she smiles shyly and then leaves the room, closing the door behind her.

  Sighing, I close my eyes for a second and take a deep breath, trying to slow my suddenly racing heartbeat. Now that I’m alone, I realize I’m nervous about spending the next few days with Alec. He can be so intense. It’s going to be difficult to keep this strictly friendly. How far do I want to take things? Have I made the right decision, coming on this trip with him? Giving myself a little shake, I decide to just let things unfold without overanalyzing everything, for once.

  I place my towels down on the side of the sink. The bathroom is roomy but sparse; the large tub in the center takes up most of the floor space. The walls are covered in a faded floral paper and the tiled floor has some large cracks running through it, but is very clean. I turn on the knobs and let the tub f
ill up with water, adding some bubble bath from the bottle that sits on the edge. It smells like lavender and I take a deep breath, the tension leaving my body as I begin to relax. I peel off my sweaty sundress, unfasten my bra, and slide off my panties. Standing naked, I glance at my reflection in the long mirror attached to the back of the door. My time away from home has improved my figure. I am slim now at the waist, my stomach is flat, and my tanned legs look long and lean. My full breasts are firm and lifted. My light blond hair falls past my shoulders, almost to the tips of my pink nipples. For once I don’t feel self-conscious about the way I look. I’d always tended to be on the full-figured side, which I’d hated; now I am lean and fit.

  The tub is almost full and the steam has started to fill the room. Turning off the knob, I step into the hot, bubbly water and sink down. I sigh as the soothing water envelopes me. The water relaxes my tired muscles and I lean my head back and close my eyes, thinking of all that has happened the last couple of days. Alec’s handsome face flashes through my mind; it was such a relief to see him push his way through the bathroom door at the hostel. He’s come to my rescue more than once now.

  I sink deeper into the tub, letting the water rise above my shoulders until only my head is sticking out. Another image of Alec and I together, his hard body rising above me, starts a deep throbbing down between my legs. I close my eyes again and imagine his hands sliding down my body. Lightly, I circle my breasts with my fingers, tracing around each nipple until they harden. Slowly, I slide one hand down across my stomach and between my legs. My legs part slightly as my fingers find my clit. Back and forth, I slide my fingers, finding the perfect rhythm. I’m slick from the soapy water and I press harder, raising my hips slightly to meet my hand. My breath becomes heavier as I imagine it’s Alec’s hand sliding back and forth in place of mine. I moan softly and press down harder; I’m getting so close.

  Just then, there is a small knock on the door, and before I can speak, it starts to open slowly. I pull my hand quickly away and jerk up out of the water. Alec walks into the bathroom and I’m immediately aware that my breasts are fully exposed. Hurriedly, I throw my arms across my chest. He takes in my nakedness casually, but doesn’t seem the least bit self-conscious to be intruding on me.

  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt you,” Alec gazes at me with a glint in his eyes. His eyes slowly drift across my body and his mouth twitches at the corner, his lips parting slightly. He looks slightly amused at my discomfort. Bastard. “I just came to bring you this,” he says, holding up a big white cotton robe, then proceeds to sit down on the edge of the tub.

  “Thanks.” My voice sounds ragged and my pulse is still racing. I feel like a small child caught stealing cookies. He’s looking at me expectantly, but my mind has gone totally blank.

  “Well, I’ll just leave you alone to finish your bath,” he says after what seems like an eternity. Standing up, he places the robe on a stool and then leaves the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

  Letting out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding, I sink back against the tub and the warm water surrounds me again.

  I’m unable to continue where I left off, so after a minute, I get out of the bath. I dry off with the thick cotton towels and wrap the robe around myself. I run a comb through my damp hair and let it fall loosely down my back.

  Hesitantly, I open the door to the hall and peer out. All clear. Muffled voices drift down from another part of the house. I quickly cross the hall and enter the small guest bedroom that has been prepared for us. No sign of Alec. I wonder where he is, but I’m relieved to have a little time to myself.

  In the center of the room is one double bed with a thin white bedspread. To the side is an antique-looking wooden nightstand with a glass lamp on top. The bulb is dim, and in the fading evening light, it is getting harder to see. The sole window’s shade is pulled down. Someone has placed my bag in the corner next to the bureau. I also spy several paperback novels on a dresser. Surprisingly, they are in English and they look like romance novels. Maybe they belong to the teenage girl I met earlier? I page through them briefly and then turn my attention back to the bed.

  The thought of spending the night so close to Alec makes my stomach flutter, and desire shoots through me all over again. I can’t get carried away, though. No letting myself actually fall for him. My heart constricts a little. I sit on the edge of the bed, holding the robe close around me. I’m lost in my head for several minutes but then jump up. I need to get dressed. I don’t want Alec to return and find me mostly naked on the bed. Or do I?

  I rifle through my bag and find my nightgown. It’s a short cotton slip with spaghetti straps and small flowers sprinkled across it. The room is hot, with only a ceiling fan for circulation and not much of a breeze coming through the small window. I’m happy the nightgown is light. A dog is barking in the distance. I take off the robe and slide the nightgown over my head. It falls several inches above my knees. The material is practically see-through.

  I turn away from the window when the door creaks; it slowly opens and Alec walks in. He has obviously just come from the bath; his hair is still damp and he is shirtless, wearing only a pair of jeans and bare feet. He looks amazing, and I have to stop myself from gaping as he walks into the room.

  He stops for a minute just inside the door and gazes at me, running his eyes slowly up and down the length of my body. He moves further into the room, closing the door softly behind him, locking his eyes with mine.

  “Hey,” he says softly, his voice low and sexy. He stops about six inches from me, his powerful body invading my space, and I resist the urge to take a step back. “How do you like our accommodations for the night? Cozy, isn’t it?”

  “Um, yeah.” I smile back at him in what I hope is a casual, nonchalant way. “Yeah, very cozy. We’ll have a hard time staying off one another in this small bed.”

  He raises one eyebrow at me and I flush, not meaning to have made such a loaded statement.

  I walk over to the bed and pull back the coverlet and sheet. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I look over at Alec. He has stripped off his jeans and is now standing before me in just a pair of navy blue boxer shorts. I can’t look away from his perfectly sculpted muscles—it’s all I can do not to get up and throw myself into his arms.

  He comes and stands in front me. I look up at his face as he reaches down, takes one of my hands, and pulls me up to him. I breathe in his clean scent as he places one hand on the small of my back and pulls me closer, until our entire bodies are pressed together. I can feel his hardness through the thin layer of my nightgown. Immediately, desire shoots through me and my legs feel weak and wobbly. With his other hand, he reaches out and brushes a strand of hair out of my eyes, then lifts my chin up so I am now staring right into his dark eyes again.

  “Meeting you has been pretty eventful,” he murmurs, not letting my chin go.

  I suck in a ragged breath. My mind has gone blank and I can’t think of anything to say. I swallow and my lips part as I wait for him to kiss me. He bends his head down and lightly brushes his lips against mine, then stops, as if waiting to see what my response will be. Instantly, my body reacts, my lips part, and I press myself harder against him. My hands reach up and I grasp his shoulders. I definitely want more.

  To my surprise and disappointment, instead of kissing me again, he pushes me away. “Emma, please. I only have so much self-control.”

  Even though I agreed we should only be friends, his pushing me away stings. I look away, anywhere but into his eyes.

  “Besides, these walls are paper thin,” he continues, his husky voice lower now. “You don’t want the whole neighborhood to be talking about us tomorrow, do you?” A flirty smile crosses his face and I can feel my good sense slipping away.

  Alec sits down on one side of the bed and pulls back the thin cotton blanket. The room is so hot, we don’t need it. “Come on,” he says, “get in.” He looks so sexy. I shakily walk over to his other side.

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nbsp; Wearing only his navy boxers, he lies back against the pillow and stretches his long legs out. The bed is too small for him and he looks lean and muscular stretched out on it. I look away to keep from staring, then lie down next to him, careful to keep as close to the edge as possible.

  Alec turns off the bedside light and we are thrust into darkness, except for the moonlight coming in through the window. As my eyes slowly adjust, I can make out dark shadows. The rest of the house is silent; it’s as if we are all alone, except I know the rooms around us are filled with people. As if to prove it, I hear a cough and then a few muffled voices. Outside, the night is silent except for a dog barking in the distance and the sounds of crickets chirping.

  Alec is silent, breathing quietly, and I think he may have already fallen asleep. I, on the other hand, am far from sleep. I cannot relax; all I can think about is how near he is to me. I try to shift positions to get more comfortable and accidentally brush my leg against his.

  “Hey,” he whispers, “what’s the matter? Are you too hot?”

  Reaching over, he finds my hand, and gently rolls me over until my body is touching his. He turns on his side and pulls me so my back is against him and his arms are around me. We are spooned close together, and his arms are around me so I am fully encircled by him. I melt into him. Slowly, he runs his hand down my side over my thin nightgown, his hand coming to rest on my hip. He pulls me even closer to him, his body pressed against mine. My breath catches, and I feel a pang between my legs.

  “This is nice.” His voice is soft, close to my ear.

  I close my eyes. If only circumstances were different. If only this wasn’t just a brief encounter, thousands of miles from home. “When are you going home?”

  “Mmm, it depends.”

  “Depends on what?” I’m frozen, hanging on his answer. Wanting him to say it depends on me. He doesn’t say anything for a while and my heart squeezes painfully, disappointment rising in my throat. Just when I think he’s not going to reply and has fallen asleep, he speaks.