Faltering Read online

  “Yes, that’s right.” I’m relieved to turn the focus onto my work.

  “Good, so you should know what you’re doing. You’ll be sorting and cataloging all the new artifacts the museum has acquired in the last year. When they’re cataloged, I will decide what goes out on exhibit.”

  “Okay.”

  “Well, don’t just stand there. Get to work.” He turns rudely away, dismissing me with a wave of his hand.

  I back out of his office and the door closes with a bang in my face.

  Great, so my new boss is a total jerk.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  Despite my initial run-in with my new boss, the rest of the afternoon at the museum flies by. I’m so engrossed in studying and cataloging the artifacts that I don’t hear the door open or notice anyone else in the room until a voice right behind me says, “Hey, Emma, time to call it quits. Want to go grab a drink?”

  I jump slightly and turn around. “Oh, hi, Matt, you scared me! I was so lost in thought I didn’t hear you come in.”

  He has a friendly smile and a look of admiration in his eyes.

  Uh oh… I know that look…

  Matt leans forward to see what I’ve been cataloging. “Pretty cool stuff. You just got back from Egypt, right?”

  “Yeah, I was studying there all summer. It was fantastic.” I move back a little in my chair.

  “So, what do you say? Are you up for a drink?”

  “I’d love to Matt, really, but tonight’s not a great night for me. I’ve already got plans with my roommate.” This is a little bit of a lie, I don’t really have plans . . . but I don’t want to be rude.

  Matt’s shoulders slump. “Sure, maybe another night. See you tomorrow, Emma.”

  As soon as he leaves, I gather my things. I’m hoping to sneak out without being seen by my boss.

  ****

  I decide to walk back to the apartment, needing both the exercise and the time to clear my head. I’ve always been able to think better when walking. I stroll the streets, taking in all the sights and sounds of my new city. Being from a smallish town where I had to take a car to get anywhere, I love that I can walk out my door and be right in the center of things. I love the feeling of freedom and anonymity I have here as well. Nobody knows me, nobody knows my past, and I don’t feel the whispers about me behind my back. After the pain and betrayal by those closest to me last year, this is exactly what I need.

  Leaving for the last few months, escaping to another country, was a welcome relief. So meeting Alec, and developing these intense feelings for him, have really thrown me.

  I arrive back at my apartment a little depressed. I drag my feet slowly up the steps. I can’t wait to collapse on my bed. Just as I’m putting my key in the lock, the door bursts open from the inside and Leah is standing there.

  “Oh my God, I couldn’t wait for you to get home to tell you about my night!” she bubbles excitedly and grabs my arm, pulling me inside.

  Her exuberance instantly lifts my mood. I smile back. “I take it you and Jake hit it off, then?” I drop my bag on the table and head to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water.

  “He is amazing,” she gushes. “So sweet, despite that hard-core sexy bod, and he just blew me away in bed, literally. I can’t wait to see him again, and luckily I don’t have to—we’re meeting up later tonight. It’s his night off from the bar.”

  “That’s great, Leah. I’m really happy for you.” And I am, but I can’t help thinking immediately of Alec. I wish I could see him again tonight.

  Stop it, you’re just making yourself miserable.

  Shaking off those thoughts I turn my attention back to Leah, who continues to gush about Jake’s apparently many charms.

  “And best of all,” Leah continues, “he’s got a super cute roommate who’s just dying to meet you. How about a double date tonight?”

  I groan inwardly and shake my head.

  “Sorry, Leah, blind dates are not really my thing. Besides, I’ve got of a lot of unpacking and things to do tonight.” I gesture toward my messy room.

  “Oh, please, please! I actually already kind of promised him.” She clasps her hands together and looks at me with pleading eyes. “I met him last night, and he’s so sweet. You won’t be disappointed. Besides, Jake has four tickets to see Kinda Blue play at the Court tonight. Please say you’ll come, we’ll have such a blast!”

  I sigh, torn over what to do. I really don’t want to disappoint Leah. But the thought of making small talk with some new guy makes my stomach clench.

  Reluctantly, I nod. “Okay, I’ll go. But this is not a date. Tell Jake to tell his roommate that I’m just going as a friend . . . no expectations.”

  “Sure, sure, no problem. But when you see Kyle, you’re going to change your mind,” Leah says confidently.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  Later that night, Leah and I get ready to meet the guys. She looks fabulous, sexy but not slutty, in a clingy jade green dress that’s cut high in the front but dips way down low in the back. I’m not at all sure what to wear. Most of my stuff is pretty casual: shorts, jeans, T-shirts. Most of the dresses I have are sundresses, not really right for a concert at a downtown nightclub.

  “Ugh, I have nothing to wear,” I moan after scanning through my closet for the tenth time.

  “I’ve got the perfect dress for you. Hold on, let me get it,” Leah says and heads to her room. She comes back beaming, holding a super tiny, low-cut black dress. “This will look so hot on you, try it on.”

  “Um, I’m not sure that’s really my style,” I say looking at the dress, hesitatingly.

  “Oh, come on, try it on, I know it’s going to look great on you,” she insists.

  I take the dress and go into the bathroom to try it on. Leah is skinnier than me, so the dress is pretty tight, and the slightly stretchy material clings to all my curves. The neckline plunges way down in front and my ample cleavage is practically bursting out. I’m not really sure this is how I want to present myself, but I open the door to show Leah.

  “Oh my God, you look amazing!” Leah gushes when I open the door. “Kyle is going to have a heart attack when he sees you! He won’t be able to keep his hands off you.”

  “That’s what I’m afraid of,” I mumble as I attempt to adjust the dress a little for more coverage. “I don’t want to give him the wrong impression. I’m really not looking for a boyfriend right now.”

  “I know, I know, but come on, let’s just have some fun tonight.”

  Since I have no other options hanging in my closet, I wear Leah’s dress, wrong impression be damned.

  ****

  Jake and Kyle are waiting for us outside the entrance to the club. There’s quite a crowd waiting to get in. The show is sold out; Kinda Blue is a hot new band, and I’m super psyched to get to see them play live.

  “Hey, there they are.” Leah grabs my arm and steers us in the guys’ direction. Jake’s face lights up the minute he spots her, and he takes her hand and pulls her in for a quick embrace. Kyle and I stand there awkwardly, waiting for the two of them to make introductions. Kyle clears his throat a little, smiling at me, and Jake suddenly remembers his manners.

  “Oh, hi, Emma, it’s great to see you again,” Jake says. Leah is now clinging to his arm; neither one appears to want to lose physical contact with the other. My heart contracts a little at the sight of the happy couple, but I quickly recover and refocus.

  “Hey, Jake, how’s it going?” I smile at him.

  “This is my buddy, Kyle. Kyle, meet Emma.”

  Kyle reaches out his hand politely to shake mine. “Hi, Emma. Jake said you were a beauty . . . he didn’t lie.” His deep voice is smooth and his warm brown eyes take me in, pausing at the deep V at my neckline. He swallows hard as his eyes return to mine. Kyle is definitely easy on the eyes, Leah wasn’t wrong about that. He’s tallish, with a strong, muscular build, and close-cropped, sandy-colored hair.

  “Thanks, nice to meet you,” I say pleasantly.
He’s cute, but I know right away I’m not into him. Mostly because the first thing I think when I see him is, He’s not Alec.

  We head through the crowd and into the club. It’s just as packed inside, but luckily our tickets give us a reserved table pretty close to the front, near the stage.

  “I just love this band! How did you manage to get these tickets?” Leah’s leaning forward in her seat toward Jake.

  “I know a guy who comes into the bar a lot. He owed me a little favor.” Jake has to shout to be heard over the noise.

  Kyle is staring at me intensely, and I’m starting to feel a little awkward. I knew a double date was going to be a bad idea. I flick my hair back and pull at my dress self-consciously.

  Kyle leans forward, about to say something, when the waitress comes over to take our drink order. I order a pineapple mango martini, deciding to let loose a little tonight and try to have a good time. I give Kyle a small, flirty smile and his eyes light up with pleasure.

  Jake and Leah are tight, laughing and kissing and whispering into one another’s ears all night. After a couple of drinks, I’m feeling talkative and tell Kyle about my summer, moving to Boston, and even about my fling with Alec and how much I’m missing him now.

  He takes it all in, somewhat amused at my ramblings. He’s easy to confide in and it’s nice to be able to tell someone what’s really going on in my head. Although I’m definitely not attracted to Kyle in a physical way, I feel like we could be pretty good friends.

  “Come on, let’s go dance,” Kyle says and grabs my hand. My head is a little too foggy to refuse, so I follow him out to the dance floor. The music is loud and fast and we dance like crazy, without touching, just having fun.

  Back at the table, we’ve ordered another round—is it the third, or fourth? I’ve lost track. My mind is definitely starting to blur now, and I know I’m going to regret this tomorrow. But for now, I don’t care. I’m just happy to be able to put Alec out of my mind for a while.

  I hear my ringtone, and my cell phone, which is on the table, lights up. Before I can get it, Kyle reaches out and grabs it.

  “This is Emma’s phone, Kyle speaking, who’s this?” He sounds a little drunk as he speaks into the phone.

  “Hey, give me my phone,” I say, trying to grab it out of his hand, but he holds it out of reach.

  “What? Dude, I can’t really hear you, we’re in a club, call back later,” Kyle is half shouting, half slurring into the phone. He hangs up.

  Great, that must be my brother. I’ve been trying to reach him all day.

  “Give me that,” I reach over and grab the phone. Looking at the number, I expect to see Jonathan’s name on the screen. My stomach does a double flip when I see Alec’s name on the screen instead.

  Oh my God!

  I quickly press redial.

  “Yeah,” he answers gruffly.

  Why does he sound pissed?

  “Alec, hi, it’s me, Emma,” I say somewhat stupidly. Of course he knows it’s me, he just called. But the alcohol has gone to my head and I’m having a little trouble forming coherent thoughts. All I can think is Alec. I miss him.

  “Yes, I know it’s you.” His voice sounds cold . . . maybe hurt? “I just got back and wanted to talk to you, but you’re obviously busy, out on a date.”

  Yeah, he sounds pissed.

  “No, Alec, I’m not, it’s not like that, I’ve missed you so much,” I stammer, trying to explain the situation. Kyle, Jake, and Leah are talking and laughing in the background and I try to shush them.

  “Yeah, sure, that’s what it sounds like. I gotta go.” He hangs up the phone. I redial but it goes instantly to voicemail.

  Devastated, I put my phone away, not sure what to do. Leah sees the look on my face and leans in to whisper in my ear, “Who was that? What’s going on?”

  “Just the love of my life, who now thinks I’m out cheating on him,” I reply mournfully.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  I wake up the next morning with a pounding headache and a dry mouth. For a minute I can’t think of anything except how bad I feel, and then I remember . . . Alec.

  Did he really call me last night, or did I dream that? Yeah, I must have had too much to drink last night. Everything seems a bit blurry in my head. I look around for my phone but don’t see it.

  Groaning, I get out of bed and head into the bathroom. I immediately down two Advil with a big glass of water, right out of the bathroom sink. Gross, but I am desperate for some relief.

  Coffee, I need coffee. I head for the kitchen; mercifully, a fresh pot has already been made. I guess Leah did make it home with me last night.

  I pour myself a big mug and add a little nonfat milk. I close my eyes for a minute and run over the events of last night in my mind. I was having fun, letting loose a little, and getting along with Kyle in a friendly kind of way. I’d made it pretty clear to him that I wasn’t looking for a hookup or anything romantic, and he was fine with that. Then, the phone call from Alec. He had totally misunderstood what was going on. I need to call him and explain right away. I find my phone and call him; no answer. I send him a text instead.

  Alec, please call me. Last night wasn’t what you think.

  I hit the send button and wait.

  After about fifteen minutes, I send another.

  I’m so glad you’re back. Please call me.

  I look at the clock on the microwave. It’s only 8:30; maybe he’s still asleep. I decide a shower is what I need to clear my head.

  I’m feeling about a thousand times better after my shower, the Advil has cured my headache, and the coffee has energized me. Now back to my real problem. Alec. He’s back, but what incredibly shitty timing. He thought I was out on a date with another guy. He’s jealous! For some reason this actually makes me happy. I mean, it’s not like we made any commitments. We’d just had one week together, no strings attached. Yet I can’t get him out of mind, and the thought of him with someone else makes me nauseated. So, yes, I am a little bit thrilled to think maybe he feels the same way. But now it’s time to clear things up.

  Just as I’m wondering whether I should call or text again, Leah strolls into the kitchen.

  “Hey, you’re up. How you feeling?” She smirks.

  “Pretty crappy, but better than an hour ago. How ’bout you?” I look over at her and notice that she is only wearing a sexy bathrobe, and her hair is disheveled in a just-got-fucked kind of way. She is looking pretty happy, and I don’t have to wonder why, because Jake strolls into the kitchen behind her, wearing only his boxers.

  His body is incredible, and the tattoos snaking up his arms and across his chest give him a dangerous, sexy look. My mouth falls open slightly, and I can’t help but stare for a moment. I’m only human, after all.

  “Morning, Emma,” Jake says as he comes up behind Leah and wraps his arms around her. He brings his head down to kiss her neck and she smiles. “You guys look good together,” I say, smiling back.

  “Thanks,” Leah says, looking over at me. “But what’s up with you? You kind of freaked out a bit after that call last night. Who’s Alec?”

  Now seems like a good time to fill her in, so I tell her and Jake about my time in Egypt and how I had planned on spending the last week of my trip sightseeing with a friend, but she had to return home at the last minute. I tell them about losing my wallet and passport and how Alec saved me, and then how we spent the next week together.

  “So, we both knew it was just a short-term thing going in, but I think by the end of the week both of us ended up feeling like something more was going on. I mean, I can’t stop thinking about him.” I sigh.

  “So that’s why you weren’t interested in a double date,” Leah says, finally understanding where my head is at.

  “Yeah . . . I mean, I’m really not looking for a boyfriend at all, anyway. But Alec and I just clicked, and I don’t want him to think that as soon as I got home I went out with another guy.”

  “He must have been pissed
,” Jake pipes in. “I know I would have been.”

  “Thanks, Jake, I feel worse now.”

  “No problem.” He grins. “But, seriously, just call him and explain what happened. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

  “I’ve been trying to, but he’s not answering my call or texts.” I say miserably. God, if I could just see him and talk to him in person, I’m sure he would understand.

  Just then, my phone buzzes with a new text:

  I’m here. I needed to see you. Come outside now.

  What?! He’s here? How is that possible?

  I look out the kitchen window and down on the street, there is a shiny black Escalade. And leaning against it is Alec.

  Oh my God!

  My stomach does a flip and I race into my bedroom to throw on a T-shirt and a pair of shorts. I cannot believe he is actually here!

  “What’s going on?” Leah calls out. But I can’t stop and explain now.

  I rush out of the apartment and down the steps to the street. Alec looks incredible, leaning against the car with his arms folded. He’s wearing faded, loose-fitting jeans and a tight-fitting gray T-shirt. I can’t see the expression in his eyes because they’re covered with dark sunglasses. He looks at me as I come out onto to sidewalk, but he doesn’t smile or make a move toward me.

  The expression on his face freezes me in place for a minute. He looks pissed and a little scary.

  Shit.

  I want to throw myself around him, but I hesitate.

  “Alec,” I breathe, no longer able to stop myself from running toward him. I throw my arms around him and bury my face in his neck. He smells incredible, and for a few seconds I start to get lost in the feel of his hard body against mine and just the fact that he is standing next to me, in the flesh. But then I realize that he is not responding.

  I pull back a little and look up at him.

  “Hey, are you still mad about last night? It wasn’t what you think. I was just out with a couple of friends.”